How was our Christmas? Well if I'm being bluntly honest, it sucked. I did not enjoy it nor did Bee. I cant pinpoint why it sucked, but it did. Perhaps it was the fact that Bee was up from 1-5am Christmas morning so we were both exhausted. Perhaps we decorated too early so it seemed like just another day. Perhaps it was because we were celebrating a holiday we had avoided for three years. Perhaps it was because Ty and Jacob died and weren't here to celebrate. Perhaps it was because I made breakfast and no one ate it. Perhaps it was because I want to start traditions but it seemed silly to do a few with Bee being so small. Perhaps it was because we stayed in on Christmas Day. Perhaps it was because my parents weren't around. Perhaps it was because Bee is still so young the joy of Christmas wasn't shinning through.
Whatever the reason, it sucked. It sucked so much that Christmas Day eve, I took down all our Christmas decorations and packed them away. Though, I will admit, this was partly done because I am preparing for Bee's 1st birthday and just wanted everything down.
So it's over and done. On we go. We are now preparing for a 1st birthday up in here, excited? Well no not really. Happy? Yes, happy and thankful we finally get to celebrate a first birthday. I am making all her decorations and we are ordering some food. Having a few people over a few days after her birthday and on her birthday it will just be us three because I'll be crying, all day long. Crying and sobbing, thinking about a year ago and how amazing this last year has been. How much my daughter has given me my life back. At least I know her birthday won't suck.
Celebrating Boxing Day (we stayed in our jammies all day on Christmas, tradition number one was a success) Matching ladies. Yes I like to dress to match my daughter sometimes because I can.