There has been something on my mind for a few days now, since Monday actually. My message from God that day was about opening my ears to listen for a very special message from God on that day. It said God had a very special message for me that he was waiting to send me that day. The only thing said on Monday I can even remember is the neonatologist telling us about the case he had seen where a baby was born with no kidneys and no fluid (near term) and their lungs were fine. For some reason that message struck me and has been on my mind since. I can't help but feel that was God's special message to me. The neo brought it up kind of out of the blue and said it quickly then went on to something else. It was like it was meant to be said to me at that very time. I am taking that as my special message from God on that day. I know with God anything is possible and it is nice to see messages from him to reassure me. I struggle sometimes with hope and faith as it is all new to me, not that I have ever given up hope or faith, if I had I wouldn't be where I am with my faith today. No one can really deny that fact that a higher power is healing our baby. There is no medical or scientific explanation so what does that leave? God.
We met with our social worker today (one of a few) and it was really nice just to talk about everything. She herself is religious so it's comforting to be able to talk about religion in our situation. I think, by the sounds of it, because of our case, how they diagnose it in the future will change. I guess we make the doctors nervous. They should be though. We didn't like how they told us to terminate or induce early and I think before they offer lethal diagnosis again in the future, they will reassess a week or two later. It's just so amazing how our little one is already making a huge difference in this world and he's not even here yet. Just think of all he can do when he arrives. Because of him things will change. Because of Ty things are changing. Our babies were here only a short time but the impact that have had here on earth is immense. Can you imagine how much of a change Jacob will make if he lives? Like I said, he already is making himself known and I can only imagine what it will hold for the future. We get a lot of our strength from our boys, they have taught us so much and we continue to learn from them. God is working on a miracle and I cannot wait to share him with the world. We want to make a difference and God is making that possible for us. He is giving us the tools to get us going. Whatever the outcome we will make it through.
On a random note I have been EXHAUSTED lately. I just cannot seem to get enough sleep. I go to bed at 9 and wake up at 8 and still can take 2 hour naps during the day. I guess it's the third trimester sleeps setting in. Another thing with this pregnancy that has been different (minus the fact I don't have kankles this time) I have been soooo itchy. They are testing me for a condition some pregnant women can get that involved being very itchy due to liver function. I hope it's nothing like that and rather it's just being itchy. I want to keep this baby inside as long as possible to give him the best chance. Which is why I also think giving him the steroid shots right before we deliver may be beneficial. Anything that could help we want to do.
We're off to Ribfest tonight, another treat for our Sweet Pea. He definitely has had his fair share of different yet scrumptious food. Hoping he enjoys it as much as mommy will. Then it's the weekend...more waiting for our next app which is Tuesday next week. I love our weekly appointments and actually after next week it'll be twice a week but I'll be in the hospital by then anyways. That will be interesting. I have never been away from my family (especially Milo) so it'll be tough being alone (even though I will have visitors it is different) it'll be challenging but at least I can feel at peace that I am doing everything possible to get this little one here alive and healthy. Those should make for some interesting blogs....but I'll have more baby updates then since babe will be getting checked more often. Then I pray in 6 weeks I can announce our miracle baby is here to stay....just taking part in the waiting game now...