I ran into a situation the other day that I was going to complain about, write a post on my facebook and mention it here but then I sat and really thought about it and decided not to. I'll share the story because it really does show how much my grief has changed me. I went out to get breakfast the other day, well I was out and needed to eat. I stopped at Tim Horton's and because I wanted to make sure they got my order correct I actually went inside (my husband would be so proud) I ordered my egg white sandwich on an English muffin with bacon, an apple juice and a bran muffin. I got the bran muffin and my apple juice and waited for my sandwich. I didn't check in the store to make sure it was the correct one as I thought it would be. But I got in the car, opened it up to eat it and realized it wasn't the correct order. My first thought was to turn around, go back in and tell them they had it wrong. My second thought was to just suck it up, take the sausage off and eat the rest then go home and complain about a ruined day (the old me would have done these two options) I should say that my sandwich was wrong because it had sausage instead of bacon. I'm not a sausage fan so I was disappointed. As I was driving my mind started to change. I was thinking, don't complain because you are blessed to even have the ability to buy something from Tim Hortons. Don't complain because you are blessed to have a car to drive and get to food. Don't complain because you are blessed to have the money to buy food. Don't complain because you are blessed to have food ready and waiting for you at a moments notice. By the time I got home (a whole 2 minute drive) I realized I was so blessed and that I would eat the sausage sandwich because I was blessed to even have that.
I realized I was blessed with so many things, a car, money, health, family, friends, everything. Getting the wrong sandwich just reminded me of how blessed I am. That is a huge change for me, so I didn't complain, I happily ate my sausage egg sandwich and thanked God I was able to. It doesn't take a lot for me to be at ground level anymore, it's the simple things that remind me I am truly blessed and I don't have a lot to complain about. That being said, I was surprised I even got upset about something so small. Normally, before I would have just said something, I have said things in the past. But something so menial and small really upset me. It just shows me that I am still in a very vulnerable stage.
Who ever would have guessed that a wrong sandwich order would put me back in place, make me realize that I am so blessed. So thank you to the lady at Tim's who got my order wrong, you really made my day great. On a day I would have normally been annoyed (like most people get) I was blessed. I still don't like sausage but I was thankful I even had it to eat.