I'm having a rather weepy day today. No particular reason, I just REALLY miss the boys today. I seem them everywhere I go and it breaks my heart that their not here..how I wish I could hold them and hug them and smother then with kisses until they tell me to stop but I wouldn't because I love them so much. I went through some of their clothes today, still smells fresh like they were only washed yesterday not more than a year ago. I wonder if those clothes will ever be used by a child of ours. Some days it seems impossible, some days I don't have hope or faith and then when I get down and out I listen to this song and cry my eyes out. It's a song I LIVE by, I love it so much. It's almost become my motto. The words just mean so damn much to me, sometimes it is all I have.
I have fallen, I've fallen twice and I have found strength to rise. I'm trying to make a new beginning and the pain does seem too much at times. However, I do find strength in almost everything, I refuse to give up. I know I have to fight for my dreams and hopes and I can do it with my faith. I pray my silent prayers do get answered though there not very silent. I do hope my broken heart can be healed, it will never be fixed but it can be healed. I am scared, I don't know what the future holds but I have taken that step. I hope my life does hold more then I can see. Hope, it's all I have and I cling to it, no matter how many times the sky falls on me I pray I will get a miracle. I want to over come the odds, when the world says I can't faith tells me I can....faith is all I have some days but it is my strength, I would not be where I am today without it. I will have the strength to continue to rise and pray my heart out my prayers will be answered.